(7). I must be a dancer-- good posture.
(8). I must not get enough sleep, or I'm stoned all the time-- groggy, glassy eyes.

"Hollywood sucks," I do agree with you that many celebrities use their status to join causes to which they know very little about.  Not ALL celebrities, but I think very many are just about joining the bandwagon, or simply supporting a political figure or cause because it sounds appealing to them at the time.  Let Kabalah be a prime example of this.  What the fuck is Kabalah anyway?  I really doubt Paris Hilton could give a rats ass what it's about, and I bet if you asked her to define its' basic principles, she'd come up with some kind of vague answer about it being "calming" and "spiritual" or some shit.  I don't think many celebrities really study it, and yet they all walk around with that stupid red ribbon around their wrist showing "Kabalah power" and such.  And what kills me even more, is that when the paparazzi are around, it seems that they intentionally make the bracelet visible as if they are trying to draw attention to it.  It's quite funny actually. 

Well, how this relates to politics is, they are both one in the same.  It's popular to study Kabalah, just as it's popular to be liberal in Hollywood, so that's why it is appealing to so many out here-- to show up in pictures with Michael Moore (like...kmmm...Leonardo Dicaprio) or rave about the splendor that Johnny Kerry is, like Ben Affleck (by the way Nicole, you did spell his name right).  Now, I don't want to take credit away from any of those that actually do EDUCATE themselves about candidates and where they stand on certain issues, etc.  But part of EDUCATING yourself too, is seeing where the other side stands on issues, and listening to them with open ears and an open mind.  Not just writing them off because they belong to a different party than you.  This is why I hate the party system.  It creates too much division and barriers.  Why should you have to completely side with one or the other?
 
Anyway, back on track here.  "Hollywood sucks" you asked the Kerry supporters to list 5 issues and exactly where Kerry stands on those issues.  Now, these are factual, I've done plenty of research (See, some of us voters do, do our homework):

1). Restoring Jobs and Rebuilding our Economy

Mary Kate Olsen is 96 pounds and leaving "rehab!" (personally, I don't care what the magazines say. I think she's a coke addict, anorexic, product of Hollywood-child-stars-burnt-out, and a genetically heightened midgit. she and her sister).  She's short (5'1" is what I read, hence the midgit reference), so 96 pounds doesn't seem so low for her, but judging by the pictures of her leaving the Cirque Lodge in Utah, she doesn't look a whole lot different to me.  Still too skinny.  But well, that's just my humble opinion.  On a serious note, I really do feel bad for her.  I think she has too much on her plate and it's going to be a long road ahead for her to really recover from whatever it is she's suffering from.  If recovery is actually possible.  Is it possible to really get over something like drug addiction or anorexia?  I imagine it's like alcoholism-- you're never truly recovered.  You live with the title for life.

Well children.  To end my thoughts for the day, I shall leave you with this: I think I have pink eye.  I woke up this morning and looked in the mirror and noticed that my left eye was all pink and made me look like I was stoned.  But just the left eye.  It's been like that all day, and it hurts.  What did I do to deserve this?  And if it is pink eye, who the hell gave it to me and why?   That's messed up.  Reveal yourself.  Trust me, I'll find out who you are anyway, so save yourself the embarrassment and just fess up. 

Good night sucky pink-eye culprits.

Thought of the day: Pink is my favorite color...but not in my eye.


 

O.k., so here's the elaborately short story (right...)-- Wednesday afternoon I was driving down Crescent Heights on my way to visit a friend and finally see "A Cinderella Story," (I'll get to that in a minute).   While sitting at a red light, I noticed something interesting: A blue Audi, I'd say maybe a 97 or 98, with a Minnesota Licence plate.  Now, being the devoted Joshy fan that I am, of course I'd know what kind of car he drives and what state he lives in (imagine that.  A talented actor not living in LA...hmmm...).  So, naturally, I was curious and hopeful when I saw this car, which was also stopped at the red light, but on the side of opposing traffic.  When the light turned green, our cars slowly but surely began to inch closer and closer to each other.  And thank god for traffic by the way (one of the few times you will ever find me saying this) because we were moving so slowly, I was able to catch a glimpse of the drivers face-- A tall, well built guy with a baseball cap, and distint face...an unmistakable Josh Hartnett face.  But here's the best part...HE LOOKED IN MY DIRECTION FOR LIKE 2 SECONDS!!!  Ok, ok, so he was probably just scoping out the scene, or being a safe and observant driver.  But never mind all that.  HE LOOKED IN MY DIRECTION!!!  That is all I am concerned about.  Oh man. 

So, this random encounter lasted a total of about 2.8 seconds.  But it was still a monumental moment in Chanel's crazy life.  Of course, when I become a famous and ridiculously overpaid actress, I will make a point to meet Josh, no matter what I have to do.  But, in the case that I don't, I will still be satisfied with the knowledge that I came a hell of a lot closer than most young-adoring fans in this country, not to mention the world, have or will ever get to Mr. Hartnett.  So, go ahead ladies, email me/call me/comment on this blog (yeah, the likelihood of that is slim to none) and tell me how jealous you are and how lucky I am.  And I will make no apologies for it either.  Needless to say, that intersection will never be the same again.  It has been Hartnettized.  And I, Chanel Gold, am going to have good dreams tonight. (note to all readers...I wrote this last night, so the pleasant dreams have already been dreampted-- deal with the sucky grammar. Just like your dealing with my good fortune).   

In other news, "A Cinderella Story" sucked major ass.  But what would you expect from a cheezy teenage flick?  An intricate plot and love story with complex emotions and characters?  Of course not.  That would be far too mature.  Especially considering that the average age of the movie-goers was about 16.  Yeah, I felt pretty out of place.  Although, I do look very young for my age, so I blended right in with those High School Sophmores.  "The Notebook," on the other hand, which I saw Tuesday instead of "A Cinderella Story," due to the fact that I was late, and am habitually late to every place I go, was AMAZING!  By the end of the film, Laura and I were bawling our eyes out.  Not necissarily because it was an emotional movie...well, that was part of it...but mostly because it was a thoroughly romantic and heartfelt story.  Bottom line: I loved it and plan to see it again soon.

Well, that's all for now folks.  Stay tuned...now for a message from our sponsors.

Quote of the day: "Boys are stupid.  Throw rocks at them." -- saw this on a shirt.  I think I'm gonna try to track it down and buy it.  Freakin' hilarious.

I woke up this morning, not on time, and decided I didn't really need a shower, or body spray, or make-up, or to even brush my hair for that matter.  Because, well, I figured it was only work, and work with smelly, unbathed, stupid children at that.  6 Orthodox Jewish children to be exact, who crave my intelligence and patience which will help mold them into patient, non-stupid, and non-smelly grown-up people.  But if there is any hope for these children at all, perhaps they will need a tutor who does not openly admit, in the same paragraph in which she claims "intelligence" and "patience," that she shows up to work late, and in a deshevelled, un-bathed state.  At least my curls were bouncy today.

In other news, I thought I'd share with you some of the funny things I saw today.  First up, was a sign for a restaurant by the name of: "Piece of Pizza."  I found that to be pretty amusing.  Mind you, it was 1:00 p.m. and I haden't eaten anything yet, so I guess at that point, anything that mentioned food in it was amusing to me.  But seriously, you have to admit that that is pretty clever.  The owners must have thought: "Screw using our family name.  Let's just keep things simple and original."  I would have suggested "Slice of Pizza," but I guess maybe that one was already taken. 

The second thing I saw that was funny, was this guy at a gas station eating his boogies (a.k.a. "boogers").  Sadly, I was looking at him to begin with just because I thought he was pretty damn hot-- he was driving a brand new, silver mustang convertable, and wearing this cool trucker hat...ahhhh....just hot...but then out came the index finger, and in the nose it went, and out the nose it came, then in the mouth the finger went.  I nearly threw up.  The funniest part was the guy tried to be all smooth about it. Like, he didn't just start eating the green ooey-gooey.  No, he did this sneaky thing, where he put his arm down after picking his nose, looked around cooly, then, I suppose after assuming no one was looking (aha! but I was), he stuck THE SAME finger in his mouth.  ha ha.  YUCK!!!  That soooo took any hotness he might have previously possessed, away from him.  Now, all I saw was a lame, disgusting person.  I mean, I know we all have eaten our boogers at some point in our lives...don't deny it.  You know you have.  But seriously.  Have the decency to save it for a private moment, like other things that are meant to be done in private...or... don't do it at all?  Use a tissue?  I dunno. 
And why on earth did one booger-picking sighting amuse me so damn much?  Again, probably the lack of food.  I guess it was the fact that it was sorta like eating.  Ewwww...ok...that's gross. I'm done now.  On a related note, I'm pigging out on chocolate and stuff right now.  I didn't notice, nor has apparently anyone in my life, but I guess I lost a pretty 8 cents this past week and a half or so, which doesn't seem very healthy to me.  Who knows.  In any case, I don't feel 8 cents lighter, nor do I think I look it, but whatever. I think the scale is lying, so maybe I shouldn't believe it.  Who invented the scale anyway?  And why do many women feel the need to dictate their lives according to the numbers on it?  It was probably a man who invented it. Women would have invented one that shows you the number you WANT to see. Not the harsh reality. 

Je ne sais quois! (dunno know if that's how it's spelled)-- I stopped by the pet store at a mall today and saw the cutest Yorkshire Terrier.  I want a Yorky more than anything in this world, and decided, since I can't think of I name fitting for such a beautiful canine, why not call it "Je ne sais quoi," because it posseses a "Je ne sais quoi" that makes it too good for a simple name.  Or, I could just call it "Coco Famous."  What do you think?